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Sad news: An ex-Man City player died instantly in an accident 😭😭
“Expulsion” from Man City? What about the other 17 Premier League cheaters, Arsenal, Liverpool, and others?
Ford, Will An hour prior
Man City’s opponents should be demoted for a variety of reasons, including overcelebrating, Roman Abramovich, and Simon Jordan.
The Premier League’s other scumbags are facing charges similar to the 115 FFP charges Manchester City is facing.
We have some excellent, legitimate arguments for why all 19 of the other clubs in the top flight ought to be demoted, as City is facing “expulsion.”
Arsenal: Overindulgent in Joy
After Mikel Arteta “stole” Jurgen Klopp’s signature fist pump or when Martin Odegaard took pictures of the photographer, the celebration police charges were dropped. However, Chief Constable Keys will be fuming over the title win, and he will have Sergeant Carragher, Constable Souness, and Community Support Officer O’Hara prepared with batons, handcuffs, and whistles, respectively, to make arrests on the final day of the season at the Emirates.
£119.6 million loss for Aston Villa
One season’s deficit of £119.6 million is concerning because the Premier League’s profit and sustainability rules (PSR) only permit losses of £105 million over three seasons. Out of all the teams competing in Europe this season, that 2022–2023 loss is the biggest. We might have to wait a year for their dismissal because the club’s executives are certain that they will meet the requirements once more this season. However, by 2024–2025, they might be in trouble because Jack Grealish’s £100 million sale in August 2021 is not taken into account.
Bournemouth: Throwing Gary O’Neil out
Gary Lineker called it “a ludicrous decision,” and a number of other pundits who were all big Bournemouth supporters the previous season concurred. O’Neil was replaced by a manager who has won 1.38 points per game at Dean Court, as opposed to his predecessor’s 0.92. And poor Gary, who is stuck in the middle of the table with Wolves, is being linked to a position at Manchester United. There were no winners, that’s for sure.
Hollywoodbets in Brentford
Although seven other Premier League teams feature an advertisement for a gambling company on the front of their jerseys, it is especially disappointing to see Ivan Toney donning one.
Brighton: A talented farmer
We can’t believe a club can have such a high strike rate on young players without engaging in some sort of heinous behavior. Backstabbing Argentine diplomats, poisoning the Paraguayan water supply, etc.
Burnley: No rocket launch
How dare Vincent Kompany play Premier League football while leading Burnley out of the Championship? In honor of the man who battled to keep a different team in the Premier League, The Royal Dyche’s patrons want it opened.
Romamovich of Chelsea
The supporters may believe they’re getting their comeuppance from their new American owners, who hardly understand the game of football, much less have the know-how to manage a team. However, their rivals and even well-meaning individuals seeking justice will not be blind to the fact that Chelsea has effectively gotten away with being funded by a man who was also supporting a murderous tyrant and his war on Ukraine.
Abramovich might still be the one to f*** Chelsea more than two years after he left.
READ MORE: Chelsea players moved after being “expelled” by FFP: Arsenal will get Mudryk as a trio from Liverpool
Simon Jordan, Crystal Palace
Who else can we hold accountable for condemning us all to this man’s pretentious beliefs and frantic verbal stunts?
Everton: Disappointing building design
Their new stadium is a far worse crime than the two FFP rules they agreed to. It has been called “generic,” “dull,” “another stadium that looks like every other one,” and our personal favorite, “just a bowl with seats.”
Sheffield United vs. Fulham: £125
It is shocking to see ticket prices up 18% from the previous season and 40% from 2019. The Fulham Supporters’ Trust released a statement saying, “So much for us being a family friendly” club.” The majority of adult tickets behind the goal against Sheffield United cost £71, with prices reaching £125 at the sides. In support of Sheffield United? Aw shucks.
Manchester City – Liverpool cyberattack
Doesn’t that sound juicy? Manchester City scouting system being hacked by Liverpool. And if it had happened in 2013—when Liverpool frequently depended on Stewart Downing and Jonjo Shelvey—rather than during their intense rivalry, it probably would have been a far bigger deal. You would be gravely mistaken to believe that Liverpool’s woebegone tactics won’t play a big role in Manchester City’s defense, given the £1 million settlement the Reds paid in 2019. They are falling hard and fast.
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